8 Mar 2020
--In some moments I am so certain of particular sensations and emotions - they are irrefutable, have always existed, and will continue to exist for any foreseeable future.
--In another moment, they are no longer as certain. Or perhaps I travel back in time to when I was undecided. Or perhaps I travel forward in time to when my mind is made up to another sensation. My emotions and consciousness travel in this way.
--It makes my long-term continuous present feel very unstable, however. My body and spirit are very much in the present moment as my brain skips and leaps, leaving an unearthly and unnerving dissonance.
--Must I constantly question my present? Allowing doubts to creep into what I once knew to be fact? Or must I question my past as one unaware? Or must I question my future, thinking it holds unfounded bias about soon to be past-me?
--Constant flux, constant motion. A push and pull of the tide. A swelling and receding of the waves.
--It is still the ocean. It still has a home on the sand. --This is what I must tell myself.